Get the Therapy you Want, Part 3 (for couples)

Ok, so you’re interested in therapy. You know it could help you and your partner have a stronger relationship, and you’re ready and motivated to put in the work that’s required. There’s one more barrier getting in the way of getting started, though.

It’s difficult to find the right therapist.

You’re browsing Psychology Today and wondering how on earth you’re supposed to know who is the best fit for you and your partner. There’s seventeen thousand pages of therapists and you’re feeling overwhelmed. What should you be looking for? What’s important when deciding on a couples therapist?

How to work through it:

  1. Find a therapist who has extra training in couples therapy specifically. You want someone who specializes in helping couples like you and who has invested their own time and effort into getting the special skills necessary to help you. Many therapists out there offering couples therapy actually mostly work with individuals, or have no training past one class in graduate school in how to help couples. My training is in Gottman Method, which is based on 40 years of research on relationships at the Gottman Institute. I also trained in Emotion Focused Therapy, another evidence-based treatment for couples. And I have further training in helping couples with trauma in their backgrounds, helping couples after affairs and helping couples recovering from substance abuse issues. There are plenty of other couples therapists who also have extra training. Keep an eye out for those folks, because those with extra training in couples work are most equipped to help you.
  2. Schedule a consult call to see if it’s a good fit. Many therapists, including me, offer free 15 or 20 minute consultations to make sure that we are a good fit before booking your first appointment. That way, I can learn more about what you’re looking for and determine whether I can help. If I think you’d be better served by another therapist, I can make recommendations. If I believe we would be a good fit, I can answer any questions you have and describe how I work. Consult calls can help us both make sure this is the right fit.

I hope this series was useful to you! I know the struggle of trying to find a therapist, but I believe that you can definitely find one that’s right for you. If you’re interested in working with me, feel free to call (585) 294-4776.